The Fondue Pot Principle
One day I needed a fondue pot. A fondue pot is not something one wants to buy. I have lived over 18,000 days now, and ... Read More
Jellybean Highfive stood in front of the back of a room, his back to the front of the wall. Directionally near to him sat a youth pastor on a stool.
“It’s going to be epic,” the youth pastor said, raising his eyebrows, which were thin and trimmed and raised.
“Really?” Jellybean asked interrogatively.
“Fo’ sho’ bro,” he said, grinning sideways and scrunching up his eyes beneath a wide-brimmed hat featuring a baseball logo of a baseball team called the Yankees.
Jellybean nodded, thinking about what the experience might be like. Would there be dragons? Would there be maidens saved and heroes made? Would people escape fire and doom and hellish fear to be released into light and love and hope and happiness? He imagined himself in an epic, with long hair and a glorious but slimming beard. A battle-axe-shaped sword in one hand a sword in the other. A shield and a bow and mighty feathered arrows from the slings of Mount Fountain, a lucky emerald amulet of burnished gypsy, and a dream the size of seven hairy kingdoms.
“I am the epic,” Jellybean said, accidentally out loud.
“Totally,” the youth pastor said. “I feel you.”
Jellybean re-noticed he was not in an incredible epic but in a room with a huge number of posters featuring men in skinny jeans and expensive euro-lady-punk haircuts.
“Why will it be epic?” Jellybean asked, eagerly like.
“Cause we’re gonna have pizza!”
15 Comments
Nick
Man, this was epic.
Danielle
Delightful! (I have a feeling I’ve met this youth pastor’s brethren)
Laura Peterson
Lots of grinning and head-shaking going on here. Well played, Sam.
Mark Geil
“men in skinny jeans and expensive euro-lady-punk haircuts” … Ha! Love it. You’ve defined a generation.
Peter B
Skinny jeans!
Incidentally, have you been introduced to Ignatius?
JamesDWitmer
Nice scene, SD. You made me laugh. Again. I appreciate it!
And, for once, Jellybean is not the silliest man in the room.
Woah.
Loren Warnemuende
I’d like to get to know Jellybean better, elaborate convolutions of language and all.
whipple
Indeed, completely pizza is epic. Indeedly.
I will not be bitter about youth ministry. I will not….
Loren Eaton
… raising his eyebrows, which were thin and trimmed and raised.
Pure, pure, pure gold.
Jonny
This post is the best post of all the posts. Ever.
James Cain
Got a Dan Brown vibe from the Yankees cap and eyebrows. Well-played, sir.
J. Highfive
This w’s amazing! Great post. Bets I’ve ever read at theis ujually-boring place!!!!
yankeegospelgirl
“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”
Heidi
Hah! This was highly entertaining! Made me go back and read all of Jellybean Highfive’s previous antics.
J. Highfive, thanks for the chuckle worthy comment. 🙂
Jonathan Rogers
@jonathanrogersThis is excellent at the sentence level.
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