@wonderseeker, praying for relief for you!
@wonderseeker I am late seeing this (or maybe right on time???) but I wanted to let you know that I have seen this and am praying for you and for others of your family or friends who may be going through their own struggles right now. Grief can be really hard in general, and holidays sometimes just put even more pressure on. So I wanted to let you know that more prayers are coming right now too.
I am late (perhaps) but I will be praying.
I admire your love for one another. Pleading with God to act is the best way we can love.
I wanted to share a prayer request passed down from generation to generation in the church: pray that God would send more laborers into his harvest fields, more missionaries into the many places of the world where the good news about Jesus has not been heard.
God responds: my own life is fulfillment of this prayer. Pray with me that he would send more still.
Thank you, dear brothers and sisters.
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Thanks for the reminder, when Jesus says to pray for something it is worth listening to.
Reviving this thread, because I think it’s good for us to keep sharing & praying for each other. It’s interesting that @lord-thoan shared his most recent request in particular, because Jan. 14-Feb. 23, my church engaged in 40 days of corporate prayer & fasting. Each week had a different theme, & one of the themes, specifically, was missions. Thoan’s post was a good reminder that dovetailed nicely with that week before it even happened.
If anyone else is still reading this, I have a couple requests.
I have a believing friend who broke up with her boyfriend when he started becoming abusive. She already has a daughter, & is now pregnant with a son by her ex. On one hand, this situation has driven her closer to God. She told me about how she’s revived doing devotions & without her daughter, & is working on committing to a church.
But she’s concerned about her little family’s safety & is wrestling with guilt over her choices. She said to me that she knows she was–in her words–living in sin, & now paying for it. I keep trying to keep her focused on God’s provision & forgiveness. I live 3.5 hours away, so I’m frustrated that I can’t do more for her, but I do what we can. She does have a support network where she is.
Would you pray for my friend’s family’s safety, that they would continue to grow close to God, and that my friend would bask in God’s forgiveness & love?
The other request is for me. As I mentioned on FB & in my forum intro, I recently took back up mountain dulcimer. Well, I’ve now reached the point where practice seems like an exercise in frustration, because I don’t seem to be improving. Sure, I know a lot of chords & can run through scales, but I have yet to go through a single complete song without flubbing it, even songs I’ve been working on from the beginning.
I’m certain a lack of consistency & maybe some bad practices in how I practice are contributors. But it’s tough to be consistent when it seems like things are going nowhere on a daily basis. It’s so discouraging to feel like I’m almost there on multiple songs, including a song that I wrote! I’ve not historically been a patient person, either, so it’s especially challenging.
Would you pray for perseverance for me?
@krose Praying for perseverance and patience for you, and praying for protection and healing for your friend.
Updates: I talked to my friend yesterday. She hasn’t heard a word from the ex-boyfriend or his family since filing a restraining order. She is happy for the quiet & appears to be doing all right.
I’m still struggling to get back into the swing of practicing consistently, but I haven’t given up, & I do seem to be making a little progress again.
Thank you for praying. I do have another one. I may have an opportunity to go to Romania to assist with a ministry later this year. I would need to raise funds for it. The kicker here is our church held a 40-day prayer & fasting time last month, and one of the prayers interlaced throughout the whole time was, “show us how we can be used to advance the Kingdom.” I’m beginning to wonder if this is my answer. I haven’t been overseas or done anything even remotely like this in 10 years.
I’m asking everyone I know to pray for wisdom & guidance for me.
@krose, I will be praying. I am sorry I haven’t been around here often enough. I will try to check in more often so I don’t miss things.
No problem, @misslinda! I figured you would check in eventually. I hadn’t checked in since my last post, either.
Updates: sadly, my friend’s ex-boyfriend is fighting the protective order. She’s mostly just disappointed right now because she hoped it was over. It’s going to be rough.
But on a happier note, I decided to go to Romania! I’m absolutely convinced that this is indeed God’s leading. I already have my passport, but will need to raise support & otherwise prepare for living in a totally unfamiliar country for a few weeks. Thank you for praying!
My friend’s court date has passed. No decision either way yet.
Prep for Romania is going well so far. I’m busy with the support-raising phase right now, & I need to schedule some routine vaccinations for the trip.
Hey everyone, trauma/abuse victim here, still healing from the fear and grief …
To explain –
Growing up, I learned that no matter what I said or did, or didn’t do or didn’t say, I could be rejected and abandoned for it. My biological father* and friends had next to no self-control. Whenever their own pain got to be too much, they would lash out and hurt me, rejecting and abandoning me, either in response to things that I did (either good or bad), or just randomly, when as of yet I’d done nothing (either good or bad).
So I learned: silence and lack of action could be reasons to be punished; and speaking and acting could be reasons to be punished; and I could never really know what was good or bad, because I got the same response either way; and I could never really know when I would be abused, because my “punishers” were never consistent in their punishment …
… except in one place: they were always very consistent to punish me if I tried to reason with them.
My response was both in love for those like me, and hatred of those who hurt me. In spiteful rebellion, I refused to let the pain and fear of pain keep me from showing compassion to them, to keep me from trying to reason with them. No matter how great the pain, I stuffed it all away, instead using the pain as energy to express gentleness, tenderness, joy, and more! In doing so, I just kept getting abused. But I also got a lot better at communication. I kept pressing forward, ignoring the pain, and kept learning, and learning …
… but that did nothing to let go of the pain. Eventually, it destroyed me and brought me to Jesus. That was 6+ years ago.
In the past 2+ years (especially the past 9ish months), I’ve been in a long season of grief, where God is slowly peeling back the layers to unveil my wounds, and help me cry it all out. He’s even given me brothers in this season who have been able to help me heal — even a father-figure who can just hold me, and let me begin to cry.
Finally, my flesh, the little child in me, is learning that he has worth.
But the fear isn’t totally gone, and neither is the grief. Some days are worse than the rest, like yesterday and today. Even just writing this post is a multi-hour long ordeal, because “dear god what do I say?!?”, and my flesh is irrationally afraid of doing/saying the wrong thing, or at the wrong time, or in the wrong way, and that our Father will reject/abandon/punish me for it. But my only hope is him, though. So there’s nothing I can do but pray, and trust, and listen, and walk, and wait on him. And he has proven that he will deliver me.
Still. The torment of this fear is it’s own kind of hell. I want it to go away. And I want clarity on what Papa wants me to do, day by day. So, I’d like prayer for that.
Also, God has told me (and confirmed in many ways), that he has a special brother-brother relationship for me, coming sometime soon, that will help complete the healing. So, I’d like prayer for that too.
Basically, just pray that God delivers me sooner, rather than later? Lol …
… now my flesh is telling me to apologize for “writing such a long post”, as though I should be ashamed, as if I’m a bother. But I’m not gonna do that. My spirit (and my hope) knows that there’s nothing wrong with this post. But man, the torment of that fear is still very, very real — like a screaming in my bones. I understand why men end up abusing their children and their wives. If I didn’t have the self-control which God has given me, and his peace which surpasses understanding, there’d be holes in the walls, and my family would be very, very afraid …
Lord have mercy.
Thanks for your love. This den of Rabbits is a beautiful place, and very much like what I’m wanting to create.
(*I refer to my biological father as my biological father, even though my parents never divorced, because that man is not my father. YHWH is my father, and the men in my life can only be fathers inasmuch as they are one with God … and that man is hardly anything more than the one who gave me my DNA. Beyond that, he provided food and shelter, but that’s it. Oh, we’re good friends now. He’s matured a lot. I don’t call him this out of unforgiveness or anger. Rather, it’s simply a realization I’ve come to. He’s not mature enough, yet.)
I appreciate your well thought through post and the background it gives. I could have prayed for you with just little bullet points, but I am far more likely to remember to pray, and to with greater understanding of your needs with the actual post you wrote.
I will definitely pray, and it sounds like God is already in progress answering these requests, so it is more of a “continue what You are doing” sort of request. I have not walked through the same thing that you are, but I am also going through my own journey of learning the Love and Faithfulness of God. I can relate to a lot of what you wrote even with a different background.
Thank you for giving me an opportunity to play a small part in the story of what God is doing in and through your life.
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